Don't Waste Who You Are

Have you ever wished you were someone else? Someone who fit in with the ‘popular’ people? Someone completely different than the person you are? In Kurt Cobain’s remarkably powerful quote, “Trying to be someone you’re not is a waste of the person you are,” talks about the pain of being isolated, heartbroken, and inconsolably lugubrious while the only way to extinguish the hole in your chest is to change the person you are. It’s like throwing your life away for someone or something that is obviously not worth your attention or time.

I, myself recall the unforgettably horrific journey I took trying to find the person I am. Although it was a terrible pain to live with, I gained profuse wisdom from the agonizing experience. With my copious knowledge on teen bullying, I know others around the world are going through the same tragedy. This worldwide catastrophe corrupts teen minds all over the universe, and has enthralled the life of a once brilliant poet, Sylvia Plath. In Ellen Hopkins’s astoundingly marvelous poetic novel, Crank, the main character Kristina, a former angel, is being manipulated by an imaginary character, Bree, who leads her through the wrong path, and ends up causing Kristina to make gruesomely regretful choices, introducing her to the terrifying world of drugs, partying, an ultimately prison. Cobain’s strikingly marvelous quote is captivating, yet unmistakably true in way that involve worldwide dilemmas, and fictional novels meant for everyone to relate to.

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Everyone struggles with their self-confidence, especially an outlandish nonentity like me. As I began to mature and grow older, I was immediately introduced to the heinously wicked world of stereotypes. I struggled greatly with fitting into the wrong crowds, and most especially, dealing with bullying. Constantly being ignored due to my eccentrically quirky demeanor, I felt nothing but isolation and despondency. Idiotically, my mind starving for unlimited attention, told me to change my aspects completely, present myself in an entirely different way.

My body, my attitude, even my thoughts transfigured into what was no longer myself, but into a haughty, devious, self-centered, manipulative barbarian who lost every beautiful quality she had. It was absolutely terrifying. My self-respect and humble charisma were flushed down the drain, never meant to be seen again. I would be lying if I said I never regretted losing myself, as well as my magnanimously admirable friends to the monstrous facet called hubris. Though of course, in every other happy ending, the main character realizes that “trying to be someone you’re not, is a waste of the person you are.” Not only me, but millions of other teens around the globe are unhappy with themselves.

Many others refuse to accept who they are, and they also struggle in dealing with their self-esteem, or their self-confidence, but the real question is, will they ever escape the “labyrinth of suffering?” Through my own experiences, I know the agony of trying to be someone completely different. Thankfully, I was able to find my way out of the labyrinth and be grateful for who I am, and what I have, but unfortunately, others may still be trapped in the horrifying maze, or worse, they could have taken their lives out of the world completely. After fighting my way through the battle between myself, and the fake I wanted to be, I soon realized that “suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem.” This morbid statement refers to the part of Cobain’s quote, “…a waste of the person you are.” it also relates to the devastatingly calamitous end of a magnificently wonderful poet, Sylvia Plath.

During the 1940s-1960s, women were everything but powerful, and nothing but a ‘decoration.’ Plath, wishing she was a man, unfortunately executes herself with the help of the kitchen oven. Not everyone is happy, and not everyone is satisfied with what they have, but inevitably, everyone is perfect in their own little way. Ellen Hopkins, the extraordinarily magnificent mastermind of one of my favorite poetic novels Crank mixes the perfect world of any American teenager, with every parents’ worst nightmare into one New York Times best selling novel. The main character, Kristina, who once was the good girl every mother dreamed of having, turns into a drug addicted, boy consuming partygoer as soon as she is introduced with the monster, crank.

Crank, which is an exorbitantly addicting drug exhilarates Kristina, forcing her to do things she would never even think about, while pauperizing her life, and destructing her already sparse self-esteem. She justifies her reprehensibly blasphemous actions by blaming a nonexistent character Bree, for making Kristina do what she already knows is beyond her jurisdiction. The significance of Crank to Cobain’s quote is the metaphor of Kristina throwing herself away for drugs, criminal activity, and an imaginary friend literally taking over her conventional teenage life. Hopkins, metamorphosing her main character Kristina into a dangerous bad-girl, not only captivates and allures readers, but also encourages them to relate to Kristina’s incongruous situation. She enforces her audience to realize how crude and unrelenting a low self-esteem can do to you, and dangers of trying to be someone you’re not.

In other words, “trying to be someone you’re not is a waste of the person you are.” Being the lead singer and guitarist of Nirvana, Kurt Cobain himself was a troubled musician before unfortunately losing his life to drugs. One of my favorite quotes, “trying to be someone you’re not is a waste of the person you are,” can be interpreted in my personal life, other teen’s lives around the universe, and bestselling novels. Cobain’s inspiring quote filled me with empathy and question, and I hope it does to everyone else as well. The world is a game and everyone that plays is a diverse character, and has a diverse personality.

Each player can either love themselves, or hate themselves. Either way, they’re stuck with what they have, and changing it only leads to disaster, so they might as well make the most of it. In other words, everyone has their own quirks, aberration, peculiarity, and characteristic, and changing will only make things worse. So now answer this, will you ever wish you’re someone else?