Studying The Bully
Why are bullies bullies? This is a question that I have pondered on for several weeks now. We all know what a bully is and what they do but have you ever thought about why a bully bullies? I have collected an array of facts to answer this question. In addition to that, I have also set up a number of personal experiences for you to explore. Lets start with what a bully is and what are the major effects.
A bully is someone who intentionally tries to mentally physically or verbally harm someone else. On average 77% of students are bullied and 13% of student are frequent bullies. This means that 77% of student are more likely to have depression that could last until adulthood and increased chance of suicide or self harm. This also means that the 13% of students, who are frequent bullies, have an increased risk of dropping out of high school, engaging in criminal activities, and not getting a proper job. My first reason for why I think bullies act the way they do is peer pressure. Your friends can really shape who you are and what choices you make.
Sometimes a kid will do anything to fit in with the “cool kids” no matter how bad it is. Did you know that 85% of bulling is for the audiences attention. By putting other people down they show that they are not so weak and that they can be like the cool kids. I always thought that bullies had no feelings because of the lack of sympathy and regret they had toward their victims. But that all changed when, one day I passed the class jerk in the hall and found him looking quite sad. I stopped and asked him if he was ok but he said he was not.
That genuine response not what I had been expecting(1). I expected a rude yell but instead his response was very soft and depressed as if his world was about to collapse. I asked him what happened and he told me all about it. Even though it was only for a minuet I really got to know the kind and somewhat caring side of him. The side that was tucked in a corner as if never to show its self again(2).
But this peek into the real him couldn’t last long, as his friends came around the corner he was back to his mean old self. This showed me that he was mean so he could fit in and that is why his real self was shoved away in a corner. It also made me realize that popularity is a big part of some kids life and some would stop at nothing to get it. I now know that bullies do have feeling but they cover it up and try to hide their true self just to fit in with their peers. Sometimes bullies have other problems at home or have been bullied in the past, that causes them to act out like they do. According to Martial Arts for Peace over half of bullies bully because of an issue at home.
Sometimes a kid would want others to feel the pain he felt when he was bullied. I knew a kid who would verbally bully me a lot. He would call me names and laugh at me. I hated him so much and thought he was the biggest jerk ever, that was until I heard about his mom. I later learned that his mom had been fighting cancer for five years. A year later the tragic news came that his mom had passed away.
I felt so bad for him but this made me realize why he acted in the way he did. When I saw him again I looked at him differently, instead of seeing a jerk I saw the struggles he had to push through. Instead of seeing a bully I saw a boy trying to put the past behind him and move on with life. My final point has to do with power. We all like power it gives us a sense of pride and responsibility but some people choose to get power in a bad way. Bullies bully to get attention, or make up for other disadvantages.
“It provides these kids with a sense of power,” said Catherine Bradshaw, a developmental psychologist who studies bullying at the Johns Hopkins University Bloomberg School of Public Health in Baltimore. She says that bullying may allow them to be accepted in society. I would like to tell you about a friend who didn’t fit in as well as most. He was shorter and was always teased. Because of this he started bulling others.
He would make fun of them, spread rumors, and even physically hurt them. Every time one of us tried to talk to him he spit out insults or make threats. Even if a teacher was to approach him, his flow of insults never stopped.(3) All that gave him a sense of power but never got him to popularity. Above are some of the reasons why I think bullies act in the way they do.
Not only have I provided you with some hard facts but also with some personal experiences. I feel that if we can understand why bullies become bullies we can learn to stop a child from becoming a bully. Bulling is a bigger problem than you think, 75% of students think that bulling is a problem in their school but only half of the parents think that. In order to help prevent kids from being picked on, we first need to assess the problem and realize the bullies side of the issue. “Bulling Statistics.
” Martial Arts for Peace. N.p., n.d.
Web. 2 Feb. 2013.
p., 2005. Web. 2 Feb. 2013.