What a Workout
I am only sixteen years old. I am not yet five feet tall and I barely weigh one hundred pounds. I’m just a little girl, not ready for reality. Yet here I am, carrying the weight of the world on my shoulders. I never realized that it was so heavy until last year when I started high school. Quickly, I learned that high school is not at all like the movies; it’s a lot less fun and a lot more stress.
Every day, there is the same nagging voice in the back of my mind that taunts me, making me feel like I need to do more and I need to do better. I never chose to work towards perfection, but it is in my nature to shoot for the highest goals and work as hard as I possibly can. With this inclination, a problem arises: school ends up taking over my life. It’s scary that I don’t have the time to hang out with my friends as much anymore because of an important history test in a few days. It’s scary because when I’m sitting at the dinner table, with my whole family and a beautiful meal, I am thinking about my Romeo and Juliet essay instead of just enjoying the time and engaging in conversation.
It’s scary because I get so anxious about having to memorize one hundred Spanish vocabulary words that I forget to just smile and live in the moment. Most of all, it is scary because I do not know if it will all be worth it in the end. Will I be successful? How will I even measure success twenty years from now? There are absolutely no guarantees in life, that I know. However, I am sure that what I am doing now will most definitely have a positive impact on my future. I can only hope that my efforts today will increase my odds at having a stable job and income.
The way I am living now is not sustainable. Just a stable job and income will not be sufficient; I will need a family and friends, health and happiness to complete my life. Recently I have come to realize this. I must find a balance, an equilibrium which allows me to plan for the best future but also live in the present. That means that I will continue to work hard but that I’m going to make time for my family and friends, health and happiness too.
I’m not sure how I will go about achieving this stability yet, but acknowledging the problem is a good start to lessening the weight of the world.
