How do parents affect their children?

A young girl at the middle school named Jaelyn has found that some of her classmates do not have the best home relationships with their parents. She feels that the key to a good childhood, is a good relationship with your parents. She is afraid that the children without good relationships, are the “bad kids” in school, and she feels that those kids are more likely to make bad decisions, that could affect her. According to the National Longitudinal Survey of Youth taken in 2009 “The combined nature of parent marital quality and parent-youth relationships affect physical health, mental health, and substance abuse outcome for youth in middle adolescence.” What this means is that the parents marriage and the quality of of the relationship between the parents and their children affects their child’s mental and physical health, along with their drug abuse, mainly in their teen years.

“Too often we set expectations for the child we want instead of the child we have. Too often, children grow believing either, ‘I can never meet up to my parents expectations. Nothing I do is good enough.’ or ‘Nobody expects anything of me. I guess they don’t care what I do.

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‘” says Bonnie Harris, the parent educator and director of Connective Parenting in Peterborough N.H. Children need to know that their parents care. One study shows that the less a child feels that their parents care about their schooling, the more likely they are to do drugs, or get involved with people who do drugs. Kids who feel as though their parents do not support their decisions are also more likely to get involved with bad people. Children feel that if their parents are not involved with their big moments (such as big sporting events, concerts, or other big things) than they will make their own big events.

Teens are usually these people making their own events, and they do not make the best decisions. Children learn and follow their parents. According to the website More4Kids “A parents reaction to stress affects the way a child reacts to stress.” Hence children follow their parents. Along with stress, children follow their parents choices and lifestyles. In order for parents to make a good life for their children they must show and have strong and appropriate relationships with other people, in order to show what is and what isn’t appropriate.

They need to be protective, so that their kids don’t get hurt, but not over protective so that they feel as if they have responsibilities and that their work is being appreciated. Parents can make a good life for their kids by keeping themselves healthy. Our parents are like Dunkin Donuts because they are always around, and provide two of the many main things that we need to stay alive.