A Modest Proposal for Uniformity

It is enforced that equality is important; children should not feel inferior to other children in the way they act dress or live. However it is also taught that being different and unique is a good thing. Each person has their unique way to act and dress, some more different than others.

While we encourage our children to be unique and express themselves, we discourage them by making them dress the same everyday. Uniforms are meant to make kids equal but it takes away the child’s identity. If uniformity and equality is the goal then why stop at uniforms. Let’s create a school where kids not only dress the same but also have the same hair, materials, actions, and even thoughts. The uniforms will be exactly the same, from sweater to shirt to socks and right down to their underwear.

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The uniform is navy blue shirt, beige pants (must be the same beige), black socks with black shoes and a black belt. Nothing different will be accepted, no different color socks and not even a headband for girls. Every single child will look exactly the same. That is what we’re aiming for, right? First of all, each child will be trained to attend this school. No child will wonder in having their own opinion and thoughts.

Each one of them will go through intensive training where they will be taught to think the same and act the same. This training will be a one weeklong training during the summer before school starts in the fall. After completing the summer training they will be admitted into school for the fall. Kids who do not pass the summer training will not be admitted and will have to either find another school or take an alternate intensive course in which they will first have to pass to then start school. During the school day, students will have a specific period for training and also to make sure each child is in uniformity. If teachers think that a child is falling out of rotation than that child will be forced to take an extra special uniformity class in place of some other existing English or Math class.

For prevention, the child will be put in a separate room for lunch to avoid any influence on other students. There will be severe punishment against rebels who go against any of our strict rules. Some of our penalties include suspension, detentions, and expulsions in extreme cases. Any act that may be seen as a rebellious act that causes chaos in the classroom or any other school related activity would lead to severe punishment of the rebel. The punishments will vary according to the crime committed and will be decided by the principle of the school. Any parent that refuses to obey the school norms and leads the child into bad habits will be fined according to his or her crime.

Fines can range from $100 to $10,000. Parents should be supportive of their child’s new school environment and should advise them to obey and cooperate with the school guidelines. Before entering the school premises each child will be inspected to make sure they are in uniform. If a child is not properly dressed then he or she will be expected to go home and fix the error. Children should not smile or have any other face expressions during the school period to preserve the uniformity.

Children should walk in single file lines with the same foot at all times. There will be no exception ever! Children who are seen outside of the line or with a different foot in front will immediately be taken out and put into a concentration training for one full day until they are retrained and ready to go back into their regular routine. It is mandatory that all students have the same exact knowledge to avoid students feeling inferior to others. Teachers must teach every student until every single one knows the same material. All test scores must be the same and if test scores vary too much the teacher and her teaching methods will be carefully investigated to make sure it is adequate.

The material will be taught until all students have the same knowledge on each subject. Students will also have hand writing class. Teachers will train students to write exactly alike to keep the uniformity on paper also. No child’s handwriting should be different. If a student is having difficulty with maintaining the required handwriting, extra hand writing classes will enforced. It is very important that the students’ class work all reflect the same message.

Extra curricular activities will be immediately canceled as it encourages kids to think outside the box and be unique. Classes like art and music will also be replaced with extra training classes. Art classes influence students to create and explore areas they haven’t, which goes completely against the school’s norms. Any other class or activity that might encourage kids to act differently or think differently will be replaced byt some kind of uniformity class. Behaviors during lunchtime will be controlled. Students will be taken in single file lines to the cafeteria where they will sit in the tables, feet down and facing frontwards.

All students will be served the same lunch everyday and bringing lunch from home is not an option. Now outsiders might argue that the kids are being treated with cruelty and unfairly. Many might even say they are being treated as prisoners, forced to dress the same and act the same. We rebuttal by saying that they are learning to all be equals while children in regular schools are being pushed down and bullied because they do not wear a North Face jacket or Ugg boots. Allowing kids to be bullied simply because of what they wear to school is fair? I stress the fact that in this new specialized uniformity school there will be no room for judging or judgmental thoughts among our students in their everyday lives.

I can sincerely say that my intentions are all in favor of the well being of the school children and their future success. However, I am not a student and do not have children in which this would apply.